Navigating the journey of first-time motherhood is no small feat. Your world transforms overnight, prioritizing the well-being of your little one above everything else. As you and your baby embark on this beautiful yet challenging adventure together, figuring out preferences and establishing a routine that suits both of you, the last thing you need is someone casting doubt on your parenting skills.
Let’s be clear: the odds are in your favor that you’re doing just fine. After all, you know your child better than anyone else. It’s perfectly okay to adjust your approach if something isn’t working—that’s your prerogative.
However, there’s a phrase almost every new mom hears at some point during her child’s first year: “I’ve raised kids before—I know what I’m doing.” This statement, while perhaps well-intentioned, misses a crucial point. Experience with another child (or ten other children!) doesn’t automatically translate into expertise on another. Each child is unique, and by extension, so is the journey of raising them.
The truth is, there’s no one-size-fits-all method to parenting. The ways in which we nurture, teach, discipline, comfort, encourage, love, and support our children can vary widely—and that’s okay. Just because someone else’s parenting style worked for their child doesn’t mean it’s the only or best way to raise a well-adjusted, happy child in a loving environment.
As new moms, our plates are already full. We don’t have the bandwidth to entertain judgment from others. So, when faced with unsolicited advice, feel free to take it with a grain of salt—or disregard it entirely. Remember, diversity in parenting styles is a strength, not a weakness.
Should you feel compelled to respond to unwarranted advice, consider saying something like: “I appreciate how you chose to parent, and I’m taking a different path with my child,” or “Your choices for your child were right for you. I’m making the choices that are right for me.”
Above all, trust in yourself, Momma. You’re doing an incredible job. You’ve got this. 💖
I’d love to have you in my Facebook group where I share more tips and tricks for navigating new motherhood. See you there!
xo, Mary